my continued comments to jiening's entry:
wahahaha! your entry's super entertaining can?! lol! IF you were a sims, you have to aspire to have 10 babies noe?!!! hahaha you're super hilarious!

talking bout your brain, i really think our brains are opposites. there's rarely a hundred million things going thru my mind. one thought at a time. typical monotasker? i believe i really am one though i can multitask by breathing and blinking at the same time.

eeks i never thought about how my brain works. and thinking back i think my brain talks to me most of the time at the speed i talk! i really karn imagine you thinking of dying when you are crossing the road. hahahaha when i'm crossing i'll go, "got car? okie i cross. hope i'll get across the road before the car comes near me" upon reaching, "waaah i sure walk fast!" hahaha okie i dun really know though. so perhaps is just spaced out. i think in one direction most of the time, i wont go and think the opposite of it.

*orange font colour since you lyk orange (:*





WARNING:
ANYWAYS, it'll be nice if you read the rest of the entry but it gonna be long. i wont recommend you to read since it's gonna be long and boring. i'm blogging because i dun mind you knowing and i dowan to forget whatever has happened in my life. the blog is just used for tracking back my life when i need it. maybe one day when i lose my memory or smth. hopefully it can be used as a back up.

shit sometimes i just feel as if my brain's dead. it doesnt work 24/7. lyk is not neccessarily there's something going through my mind. so far my mind havent felt tired of thinking. at most when i imagined myself dying [that was when i was at dzongri going halfway up to watch the sunrise] i thought, "ohmygod. i feel dizzy. what if i feel so dizzy i just lose my balance and roll down the cliff? what if i got no strength to hold on the the grass [is that?] and the grass break off on me?" the same questions just repeats in my mind. it wont think and convert or link to other things. as the questions go through my mind i get dizzier and finally decided to just go back to our hut ): now thinking of it, i feel so incomplete. it's my greatest regret so far sigh. yiteng's really consoling when she told me that the sunrise was nothing really that wonderful :D she's always saying things lyk, "if it comforts you, so and so is blah and blah." hahaha and it really gets comforting to know she's trying to comfort you (:

in fact i think my brain thinks in such a way it's exactly the same speed as how i talk. whatever i'm thinking, i can hear my own voice talking to myself at the very same speed and tone. i dun think of the opposites lyk if i'm going to die who will be affected. it just go lyk, "i wonder who will come and attend my funeral. will they cry? will i make a difference to someone else's life during my lifetime." and images of my sisters will appear. hahahaa i dunno why, but i confirm they love me alot and i should have made a difference in their lifes i hope. how long will they cry for me when i'm dead? what if they die earlier den me? is possible if i believe in the lifeline of my palm. is so ultra long i'm so afraid. i'm selfish to such an extent that i dowan to see anyone dying before i do but i dowan to die so soon yet. i dowan to die old. i wan to die in a pretty state. what really happens when i die? issit really lyk sleeping just that you never wake up, your heart stops beating and you have no more dreams or nightmares. or that i go heaven a few days and go hell a few moments? i dowan to go hell. so what exactly it's lyk in heaven? do they wear angels' clothes or do they wear commoners clothes? do they get to eat free of charge? or do they have banks lyk ours and go to work at their respective workplace? do they sleep and live in houses?

yeah so much of this unexplainable questions. back to my current life i suppose. getting back block test results. i supposed me failing everything except for physics. but it turns out that maths physics and chem all passed with a D. chem teachers say i have to buck up and i really think i should. not just for chem but everything since i really noe now that i havent got a quick thinking brain and i just aint smart lyk smarties. since i'm not smart i just have to try working harder isnt it? sighs. never before in jc that i got all Ds and below for major exams ): really quite sad but think i deserve it eh. i noe i havent been putting in sufficient efforts in the blocks. think is because i left many of my tuturials untouched that's why i havent been coping well.

and my parents came for the dialogue session just now. got donuts from jiening, they're super nice! my parents know my results already and think they also got nothing much to do about me already since it's me studying not them. i'm prepared for more naggings for the rest of the term/year but i karn promise i wont explode anytime. i feel that my dad wants me to drop econs but i dowan! is useless wad. is not lyk i excel in case study whatsoever. i'll still get the same grade even if i drop to h1 since both require us to answer an essay and a case study. all i have to do is learn to give what the examiners want and give it to them.

that day thursday, before econs i wasnt exactly high, in fact rather moody already. over psp things and over my blocks. i'm one of the strong foundations in my class already. i wonder if tanky's going to say, "your daughter is doing badly in her studies. she should work much harder" blah blah on the day of parent-teacher meeting with my father. den i got all moody and went for econs. got back my econs script and it's the strongest foundation in class le lah. i didnt really laughed or showed any expression. just irritated by mitzi's laughs whenever she laughs at ppl's mistakes. is so irritating. i dunno if she's committing the same mistakes herself or not. but it just isnt really right to be laughing at ppl's mistakes isnt it? so i got pissed and maybe my face was really sour? anyway mr nandwani asked if i was alright at the end of class and tried consoling me though. but i hate it when teachers do this to me. it just doesnt feel right and everytime when teachers do this to me, tears will just start welling up. i cannot understand why either.

anyways since it's a new term,
yihui's resolution for term2:
1) try to get tutorials ready for tutorial lesson
hope i'll keep to it.


goodnights! enjoy your sport carnival!